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Ha Ha Down My Mums Using A Knife To Eat Beans.

Discussion in 'Cardiff City Forum' started by Joecity, Jan 11, 2019.

  1. Joecity

    Joecity Ballon d'Or Winner
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    I Couldn't even be fucked to get a fork. Been kicked out of my house and the separation is final. Massive scenes. Lost my dogs, my place in France, the decent car. Fuck all that. Not important. To all of those who in the past in school that and said I wouldn't amount to anything then screw you. When I left home at 16 I thought you needed a knife and a fork to eat beans but I know now that a fucking knife will do cause I'm starving. I'll tip the beans straight into my mouth I have to. II always knew that but it's like an epiphany. I'm never losing at life again. Nothing beats having next to fuck all trust me. Your possessions end up owning you. Fact. A fact that makes you unhappy trying to hold on to them. Look how happy I am now. I'm choosing Pickem and going to sleep. I'm fucking winning.
     
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  2. Mrs Steve R

    Mrs Steve R Ballon d'Or Winner
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    All your fake internet friends are here for you Joe :thumbup:
     
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  3. Colonel Cardiffi

    Colonel Cardiffi C'mon CITY!
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    Is this genuine?
     
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  4. Barry Shitpeas

    Barry Shitpeas Ballon d'Or Winner

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    Apparently he’s lost his dogs. Well he’s not going to find them eating beans with a knife is he.
     
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  5. Goslow

    Goslow Ich bin ein fotze
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    He's lost his dogs in France? Didn't Bonnie Tyler make a song about that?
     
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  6. Joecity

    Joecity Ballon d'Or Winner
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    Yeah. I know I mess about on here but it's 100% Don't even feel bad for me. I was so miserable it's untrue. She can have all the stuff. I'll just get back to basics without the constant headaches. I'll miss her some days and my dogs all days cause I can't just take em back to a spare room in Barry. I'll always see my son who could see how miserable I was. I'll be gutted from time to time but I don't need another 30 years of this.Kin ell. This has been dragging on for ages. It's a relief. Nobody wins when the house is full of poison. Such a shit situation. No matter how much I bend she just wants me to break. No more.
     
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    #6 Joecity, Jan 11, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2019

  7. Barry Shitpeas

    Barry Shitpeas Ballon d'Or Winner

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    Aw man. I’ve not been in your situation but god knows the thought has crossed my mind a few times.
    I suppose if it’s really been coming for that long I imagine it must be a weight off your shoulders.
    Life’s too short to spend it being miserable isn’t it. Doors close, and doors open up, new opportunities, blue skies ahead and all that shizzle.
    :thumbup:
     
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  8. Colonel Cardiffi

    Colonel Cardiffi C'mon CITY!
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    Women are relentless. Bill Burr said it best when he said that women erode you like waves washing up on the shore, just scrubbing a bit away from you every day.

    Here's his "psycho robots" analogy:



    They don't play by the same rules as men and they have no mercy. They'll grind you into the ground if you let them and you could end up hen-pecked like the husband on Keeping Up Appearances, choosing the easy life, never wanting to show dissent so to avoid days of moody silences, frosty confrontations and almost-out-of-earshot mumblings.

    [​IMG]

    It gets to the point where it's either fight back or leave. Fair play to you mate, not an easy choice to leave all that behind but no good marriage ends in divorce. :thumbup:
     
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  9. Joecity

    Joecity Ballon d'Or Winner
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    Thanks mate. I'll be genuinely interested to see what I can do. Instead of being myopic and clinging on what can I do just by the hand of circumstance. Av I got anything left in the tank. I bet I fucking have.
     
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  10. Nid Dave

    Nid Dave Ballon d'Or Winner

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  11. Joecity

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    I remember being in the pub as a 16/17 year old full of life, overflowing with enthusiasm, spilling it everywhere, even over people that didn't want it. Wondering why on Gods green earth older guys would just be sat there looking into their pints. Just fucking looking into them. They must be fucked after work I thought. Look he's fucked fair play I thought. Fucking grafter. I know why now. Head on the bar seems like a comfortable pillow.
     
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  12. Colin Wanker

    Colin Wanker Club and Country Superstar

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    Stay strong fella . Slid down the snake when I hit 40 , kept the dog but lost loads of material shizzle. You will get good and bad days but if you ain’t a happy bunny crack on .
     
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  13. Steve R

    Steve R Ballon d'Or Winner

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    Best wishes Joe. Come down and see us for a drink (or something!) sometime. :thumbup::bighand:
     
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  14. Ainsley Harriott

    Ainsley Harriott Give your meat a good ol' rub
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    We all off over Joe's mum's to re-enact this tonorrow night after City's win? :hehe:
     
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  15. Joecity

    Joecity Ballon d'Or Winner
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    Do you know what you couldn't come over my old house. She'd have none of it. Who the fuck are these people type o buzz.Not cause she's snobby but because she fucking miserable My mates just stopped calling.
     
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  16. Eat Y'self Fitter

    Eat Y'self Fitter **FORUM PRESIDENT**
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    Ow man, does this mean the offer of a week in your French gaff is no longer valid?

    Seriously though, sorry to hear this, never any fun this kind of shit.

    I went through something similar a while back, no kids though, eventually cane out the other end stronger & very much happier. I'm sure you will too. Stay strong bud.
     
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  17. Colonel Cardiffi

    Colonel Cardiffi C'mon CITY!
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    It probably seems a bit grim but you only get one life as far as you know and it's too short to spent years in misery.

    You might regret some decisions on your deathbed but getting out of a dysfunctional relationship won't be one of them.
     
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  18. Nid Dave

    Nid Dave Ballon d'Or Winner

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  19. Colonel Cardiffi

    Colonel Cardiffi C'mon CITY!
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    What are you doing???
     
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  20. Joecity

    Joecity Ballon d'Or Winner
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    Gentlemen and Lady(ish) thank you for the kind words. Very much appreciated. Good people.

    :thumbup:
     
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